I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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