I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize