I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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