Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
3pm strippers are depressing
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
