She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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