don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
