Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
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