we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
