Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
