Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
