..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
