if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Do you have feelings for this penis?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
