Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
