shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Randomize
