Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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