she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
