He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize