Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
