Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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