just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
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You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
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I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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