dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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