the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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