Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize