Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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