Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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