I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i love accidental penises.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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