I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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