Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
