on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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