he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
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