did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice