I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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