she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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