My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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