also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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