ugly people sure do ruin things
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
whose ass print is on the piano?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
