Don't you send me to vm
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
