rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Randomize
