xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
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