just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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