how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize