Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
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