Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
