If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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