I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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