It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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