But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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