Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
