You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
