once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
